It's nice to look up!

We told our investigator, Hermana A. that if she came to church we would bring her a Liahona issue because she showed us a magazine from another church and we were like "oh yeah, well this is an adventista magazine, but we can bring you a magazine from our church when you come to church tomorrow!" Let’s just say we'll be bringing Hermana A. a Liahona issue the next time we visit her ;)
YES! THAT'S RIGHT SHE CAME TO CHURCH!!

Decorating to Celebrate

Sister missionary's birthday!

¡Feliz Cumpleaños Hermana!

That’s the level we're at right now - celebrating the fact that people are actually choosing to come to church. She's super old and really tiny and skinny and very poor. She's pretty harsh just in her demeanor with her grandkids, kind of freaks me out. You just see the "natural" side of people come out when they start abusing kids and it makes me think of the talk Elder D Todd Christofferson gave about the Moral Force of Women.  He quotes Sis.Nadauld as saying, 

“The world has enough women who are tough; we need women who are tender. 

There are enough women who are coarse; we need women who are kind. 

There are enough women who are rude; we need women who are refined. 

We have enough women of fame and fortune; we need more women of faith. 

We have enough greed; we need more goodness. 

We have enough vanity; we need more virtue. 

We have enough popularity; we need more purity.”  

I love it.

But Hermana A. is a sweet little lady too. Don’t worry. During our lessons she kind of zones off and looks really sad so we've done some changing up of our lessons with her sometimes if we get the sense that she needs something different but she could progress. We'll see.

We brought a member with us this past week to visit her and I swear you guys it was the best feeling to finish climbing up this hill, see Hermana A. bringing out the little bench she puts out so we can sit down and she always wipes it off before we sit on it (so cute!) and to be like "buenas!" and then have the member we brought be like "Hermana A., cómo está?" and see them hug and sit together and reminisce about something. Ahhh it was the best.

Just evidence that going with members doesn’t always have to blow up in your face like when we were trying to teach about the Plan of Salvation and the member we bring decides to bring out a Lesson 3 pamphlet and teach everything he wants to and of course include talking about tithing....It’s more evidence that we should tell the member specifically what we want them to share haha. We're noticing that the three like super solid members of this ward are these three old ladies, Hermana SC, Hermana G.and Hermana RC. Thank heavens for strong, old ladies :) They’re the best.

These past few days have been pretty weird, idk I’ve just been sort of fed up. I’m tired of people not being able to pronounce my last name right and people being obsessed with knowing our first names or asking us random questions in the middle of lessons. I understand it’s all exciting to know our first names but there is no way I’m telling anyone. They sit there and try and say your last name and then they end up laughing about it and making fun of it and you’re just like "Ok yeah we're done with that now". Names are precious. So so precious. That’s something I’ve learned. The other day we were teaching like 6 new people and I felt like we were really getting somewhere with the lesson of the Plan of Salvation when one of the old guys was like "You guys don’t have boyfriends, do you?" ("No") "But you guys can have boyfriends on your mission? Are you married?" And then this girl was like "You guys can visit him right? (pointing to this kid who didn’t say a word the whole time) and I was like "Well...um where do you live, yeah we could visit you." Then she added, "Because he wants to receive the charlas, so he can marry you..." Then another lady there was like "So you’re not married?" and I was just like "No we don’t have cell phones so we don’t have a number, no we're not married, and if I was I wouldn’t be here. I would be with my husband. Our purpose here is to help the people and bring them to Christ....¿Where were we?" And everyone just started to laugh. That probably frustrates me the most when we get the sense that people actually want to learn and are understanding and we're asking questions to see where they’re at and then they haul off and ask questions that don’t have anything to do with what we were talking about. But it’s all with patience, love and a sonrisa, but obviously not TOO much love and smiling or they’ll ask for your number. Gee whiz it’s so dang complicated trying to save people's souls. :)

The day after cambios we shared the story of Abinadi and wicked King Noah with a family that still hasn’t come to church but has started to defend the Book of Mormon to their friends and neighbors. They’re determined to not get baptized since they were already baptized in the Adventista church and they just don’t understand about the priesthood or the apostasy yet. It’s sad (but necessary) to try and tell people that really their baptisms weren’t valid. It was neat to turn to my comp and whisper before the lesson "Do you know this story?" and have her shake her little head “no”, so it was like I was teaching everyone :) It was cute :) I used the gospel art book! It was worth lugging that thing around all night. It’s the coolest thing and the people pay attention more.

I don’t know if I’ve told you guys yet but this is one of the places where they send the second pair of Toms shoes you pay for when you buy a pair. So if you buy Toms, know that like every other person here wears Toms shoes :)

I read a story in the primary section of a Liahona that was called "When Ducks Don’t Float" and it talked about how baby ducklings don’t float at first when they’re really little because they have to let the oil from their mom’s wings coat them first. Interesting yeah? We all need our moms and our dads to help us out. I really missed my family these past few days. Sometimes it just hits me and I feel stuck all over again. It’s the worst feeling. But it won’t last forever and I know my family will always be there for me :) But when I have a family as great as mine, how can I not be homesick?

So even though correlation meetings are frustrating and there’s a ton of gossip here, and we're forbidden as missionaries to go to the other leadership meetings positive things do happen like this little Chow Chow dog that someone brought into the internet café. I’m about tearing up at how cute it is. These little creations soften my heart  just when I need it. They are such a blessing. The stars in Santa Rita are really pretty :) We're that close to the mountains here that they’re really bright and close and sometimes we'll be walking home and it will be dark and I’ll just stop and look up and be like "Ay, Hermana, mire..." I cut out a quote from an Ensign magazine that I love. It says "Take time to gaze into the heavens  where the courses of the stars and planets are evidence of God knowing his majesty and power" (D&C 88:41-47). With all the craziness that goes on under the stars, It’s nice to look up and remember that God is there and mindful of his children :)

Love you guys,
Hermana Despain

What More Proof Could You Want or Need?!?

So we had the transfer meeting this morning! So good and so much fun. It's always so so nice to get together as missionaries, because no matter how hard the days, I’m reminded that I’m not doing it alone :)

So I didn’t have changes and neither did my comp! So we've got 6 more weeks together which we're both really happy about and we're praying for baptisms to come through. So everything is super tranquilo. It’s the best to go to changes without maletas and to go with your comp and come back with your same comp. But it was HOT today. Blazing hot! But H. had changes to Roatan and now I’ll be...drum roll....living with three Latinas! The new comp has the same time as my comp, almost 5 months. She was in Tela before. Let’s just say we might need to be working on our patience a lot this change. But let’s just say goodbye to my English skills yeah? But since I’ll be here another 6 weeks with my comp who was “born here” (her first area in the mission). I’m thinking she'll have changes this next transfer and I’ll stay here another change after to show the area and then leave...but we'll see how things play out.

As far as the special musical number of "My Heavenly Father Loves Me" by Sally Deford that I played with Hermana H? Let's just say we played better for the conference with Elder Amado....hermana got a little lost and that stressed me out cuz I didn’t know if I should stop and go back to start a section again cuz it was just done for, so we actually did stop and start a section again. SO EMBARRASSING!! But it was worth it and it’s always good to do something nerve wracking as if every day isn’t like that haha. Nah but really though you get pretty comfortable as a missionary with your routine. I was given the idea of having a day of not planning citas necessarily and just being guided by the Spirit as to where we should work and go...interesting yeah? I really want to try it. My comp is scared of contacting so I think we're going to work on that too.

I never told you guys but my comp is a convert of about 3 years! So I have to remind myself

sometimes that we're both still learning together, that of course she doesn’t know all the hymns, and of course we won’t always know all the answers to these people’s crazy questions.

Some of the typical things we will hear from people during our lessons  "pero es lo mismo dios" "todas las iglesias hablan de dios" "ya me fui bautisado"  "y de que pais es usted?" "andan cansadas verdad?" (claro que si) "mira hermanas, fijese que" (I’m still working on my patience as people give us excuses like I’ve never heard before, still working on looking at them as if they were in white or as Heavenly Father sees them, as his children :)

So as far as actual missionary work goes ;) We went to initially visit the girl that told us we bring her happiness, but she wasn’t home. But the less-active Hermana R. You guys it broke my heart. She changed completely. She had told us the last time she was going to another church that her daughter or her daughter in-law is going to so she can support her and then bring her back to our church...right....good plan flirting with Satan there....but this time around she 1. was really defensive 2. wouldn’t look at us 3. was acting super nervous. She kept telling us "no estoy en error, no estoy en error" and I couldn’t help but think about an addict who won’t admit that they have an addiction or that they need help. Interesting yeah? I never took my eyes off of her as she was talking so I could really get everything she was saying with her words and her body language, and we just listened. then I told her straight up "Hermana, usted es diferente ahora....yo puedo ver que está nerviosa, qué algo pasó..." It was just so sad to see her totally different and I could sense that she just didn’t want us there, that she was uncomfortable. She started to tel us that we were telling her that she is sinning and I was like "Hermana, Jesus Christ went looking for the lost sheep, he didn’t just leave it out there". She also kept saying "yo tengo Jesus en mi corazón, yo tengo Jesus en mi corazón" Then she got all weird and started telling us she was the church, that she was the temple, that God has never left her. I’ve found that here we've had to go back to the basics and verify with people that God and Jesus Christ are different personages, that they have their own bodies but that they are one in purpose. Super interesting yeah? We've gone back to nursery, but it’s good, it’s really really good. One of the most powerful things to say I’ve found is to just be like "hermana, usted sabe esas cosas..." as sad as it was to sit there with this sister we almost had returning to church, it was such a good learning experience. anytime people are having issues, anytime they’re struggling, we ask them if they’re praying and reading the Book of Mormon and guess what? surprise surprise, they’re not. Actually its never a surprise. What more proof could you want or need that the small and simple things matter? Scripture study, healthy food, exercise, sleep, prayer, church, general conference, family home evening....it’s all essential!

I found a quote in an Ensign that I really liked and I wanted to share it with you guys "Each of us faces an uncertain future. But when we face it, remembering what we already know, we face it with faith. We face it with good cheer. We face it with confidence" (April 2010 Ensign, Elder Lance B. Wickman) You’re gonna think I only ever read Ensigns here, but we do work I promise! It’s just that we have to get back to the house pretty early since it’s so dangerous here...

Well it’s just another week here in Santa Rita! So happy to be with my comp again in our area, I think we'll have a lot more success this time around, but once again if we do all we can. We won’t be disappointed in ourselves. This area is rough. It’s hard and everyday brings new challenges, but we're still laughing everyday and smiling and I’m still having the time of my life serving the Lord on my mission in Honduras :)

Con todo mi amor!
Hermana Despain

Never felt so dirty and yet so clean!

WHAT’S UP!?!?!??!?!?!?!? I miss everyone a ton. Sometimes it just hits me and I miss everyone and don’t think I can survive another year just emailing people...but hey, mother’s day is right around the corner right? :) HALLELUJAH!!

So this week has been hot hot hot but strangely windy which is a blessing and a curse here in Santa Rita or as I like to call it el infierno...because it’s super dusty so we've been fighting dust storms and polvo and junk. Last night we were in a cita with a lady who started going to a different church and her friends were with her so we asked if we could share something with them. They said yes but one lady never even turned around. I was talking and then I stopped and realized none of them were paying attention and I just quit. I just quit talking I was so frustrated, I just looked at my comp, my poor little Nicaraguan comp. She is so patient with me. I love her to death. She is the best :) but the 5 minute gusts of wind with a ton of dust didn’t help the situation at all. What scares me is when they’re all talking, and then everyone laughs and suddenly I have like 10 pairs of eyes staring at me and I obviously missed something super important and the poor little gringa is just sitting there like "¿Cómo?, ¿Qué pasó?" and no one cares to fill me in....but it’s all worth it right? :) right.

So Honduras got a shout out on the cover of the March Ensign yeah? ;) Then there’s a pic somewhere in there of two missionaries walking and there’s a moto taxi in the street, don’t know if it was in Honduras but who knows?!

I asked my comp at one point this week what she thought and felt when she saw my pic come up on the big screen at the changes meeting and she said she remembered me from the Christmas video we did of the mission. She told herself, "por lo menos voy a reir". That made me smile :)

We had lunch with a super solid member of the ward and she talked and talked and talked for like 2 hours with us afterwards but we loved listening to her and we realized that with all her crazy kids, she probably doesn’t get a lot of time to talk with girls or women or at least someone that will sit for longer than 20 seconds and nod and smile :) She told us how important it is to stick with what we know and was like "sigue fiel después de sus misiones" and we talked about how so many RM’s go less-active or don’t marry in the temple. To take that break and listen to a strong member’s counsel and advice, it’s like they turn into our moms for a few hours and we're all ears :) I’ve decided that here in Honduras and I guess in all parts of the world, there is at least 1 solid family in each ward. But its true, they’re the rocks that are keeping the wards together.

2 Corinthians 4:8,9,15-18 talks all about missionary work and it’s so true! We are put to the test every day whether it’s getting ourselves out of the house when it’s blazing hot outside or we can tell the people don’t really want to listen to us, or members stop going to church. All of these trials make us stronger. We're faced with adversity but we never fall. Sometimes it feels like it, but we really just trip a little bit. (I literally trip here like everyday it’s the worst, the rocks are like Satan in my path.)

I talked to a Testigo de Jehová for the first time this week! It was really hard not to argue or fight or lose my temper with her. She was like "yo soy testigo de Jehová, con mi esposo y tambien mi hijo". She went on and on about numbers and the amount of people that are going to heaven and all that and then we met an Adventista in the street and tried to invite a Catholic woman to pray later about what we shared with her but she straight up told us no. :)

I decided to bring a picture around of the family to show people and man you guys it’s the cutest thing. I pulled it out during a lesson when we were talking about families and I was looking down like pulling it out and started to turn my scriptures where I keep the picture and I was like "Here is a picture of my family!" I have never seen people move so fast  haha in like 2 seconds I had 4 women in my face looking at the picture. It was the sweetest thing :) It’s fun to hear their opinion of you guys :) Mostly they just say "¡Hay qué lindo!" and I have to agree :)

We got called Elderes for the first time like last week. That was pretty funny haha.

I’ve never felt so dirty in my life but I’ve also never felt so clean. Physically we're just dirty all the time, with mosquitoes trying to give us malaria and bug spray all over us and the sun burning down and dirt all over us and polvo flying in our faces, our hair everywhere and our clothes all nasty, but spiritually I’ve never felt so clean. That’s all :)

We did a teaching practice at our district meeting this week and it went super well and we taught with a lot of unity, as usual ;) But my zone leader told me and the other gringo that was our investigator with his comp, that we need to let our comps take the lead more. So I let my comp take the lead more this week and I’ve learned to really let go and just quit talking. It’s been a nice break :) and it’s really good practice. I’ve learned a lot about protecting my comp, not only physically but emotionally. I’ve started to show my comp a lot more of my love for her through service or just putting my hand on her back during church. She really hasn’t ever known what love is in her life so I sort of chastised myself when I was getting frustrated at the fact that she wasn’t showing me love haha. It’s been so neat to see the transition and the change in my comp, she has really gone from being shy and quiet to coming out of her shell and showing her personality and being happy and impulsive and spontaneous. It’s so great :) I felt like I trained her in a way....so that’s been nice to see. She feels like my daughter :) If she transfers to another town I’ll be really sad but I’ll be happy for her, to be able to get out of here, since she’s been here her whole time. But she’s also a really great companion because randomly we'll be walking and she'll tell me what the name of a tree is. She helped me eat a tamarino the other day. Those are the times I love, just taking two seconds to stop and eat a tamarino cuz she knows how since she's from Central America!


James 1:8 "A double minded man is unstable in all his ways."..is that not the coolest!?

I’ve noticed that my Spanish has gotten a lot better with all this time that I’ve spent with the latinas! It's great :) They’re the best!

We called people to remind them about church but we decided to not go by for anyone to see if they really had the desire to come to church. I know it sounds horrible but guess what happened? No. No miracles. We had zero investigators in church. Now I understand that it’s our job to bring people to Christ and baptize, but we aren’t here to carry them to church. We're taking their hand...cuz if we’re carrying them to church, they won’t learn how to walk on their own. Reminds me of Coach Boone, Denzel Washington's character in Remember the Titans when he says in response to the assistant coach urging him to ease up on the football players, "You're crippling them. You're crippling them for life!"  So it’s a test of faith and we didn’t see the miracles, but it’s a price we paid and now we know who’s progressing. No one. And we know who needs help. Everyone. But so what else is new?

We were going to visit a less-active sister, R., the one that gave us shoes that one night? She had visitors already so we shared with her nuera and she ended up telling us how she feels an emptiness in her heart but doesn’t know why cuz she has her husband, her friends, everything. I wanted to just be like "Don’t worry. We have the answer! It’s the gospel!!!" So we scheduled a cita with her for Tuesday. We'll see what happens. She works four days and has a descanso the next four. She told us,  "Ustedes transmiten alegria". That made me feel so good.

I hope you guys have a great week, keep smiling :) cuz as members of this church we have the best gift ever. Really though. I’ll probably write again this Wednesday after changes and I’ll let you guys know if I have a new comp or not! Love you guys!!!

Con amor,
Hermana Despain